Unforgiven Eve

And there she was.

He could touch her, smell her scent. Her hair was waving down her shoulders just like it did during those endless summer nights...

And suddenly it all happened.
The screams, the blood, the impotence, the flames surrounding her consumed body while the devilish creature laughed...
NO!

...


The man woke up in a cold shaking, completely covered with sweat.
It was just a nightmare. Nothing more. He tried to calm down and recover his breath. He looked at the grilled window, illuminated with the winter moonlight. There were a cigarette and a match upon the window. He refused to think about it and just lit the cigarette.

The bell tolled twelve times. Somehow he knew it was New Year's Day.
In his brains, these lyrics accompanied his New Year's Cigarette:

Lay beside me, tell me what they've done
Speak the words I want to hear, to make my demons run
The door is locked now, but it's open if you're true
If you can understand the me, than I can understand the you.

Lay beside me, under wicked sky
Through black of day, dark of night, we share this pair of lives
The door cracks open, but there's no sun shining through
Black heart scarring darker still, but there's no sun shining through
No, there's no sun shining through
No, there's no sun shining

What I've felt, what I've known
Turn the pages, turn the stone
Behind the door, should I open it for you?

What I've felt, what I've known
Sick and tired, I stand alone
Could you be there?, 'cause I'm the one who waits for you
Or are you unforgiven too?

Come lay beside me, this won't hurt I swear
She loves me not, she loves me still, but she'll never love again
She lay beside me, but she'll be there when I'm gone
Black heart scarring darker still, yes she'll be there when I'm gone
Yes, she'll be there when I'm gone
Dead sure she'll be there!

What I've felt, what I've known
Turn the pages, turn the stone
Behind the door, should I open it for you?

What I've felt, what I've known
Sick and tired, I stand alone
Could you be there?, 'cause I'm the one who waits for you
Or are you unforgiven too?

Lay beside me, tell me what I've done
The door is closed, so are your eyes
But now I see the sun, now I see the sun
Yes now I see it!

What I've felt, what I've known
Turn the pages, turn the stone
Behind the door, should I open it for you?

What I've felt, what I've known
So sick and tired, I stand alone
Could you be there?, 'cause I'm the one who waits,
The one who waits for you

Oh what I've felt, what I've known
Turn the pages, turn the stone
Behind the door, should I open it for you?
(So I dub thee unforgiven)

Oh, what I've felt
Oh, what I've known!

I take this key (never free)
And I bury it (never me) in you
Because you're unforgiven too

Never free
Never me
'Cause you're unforgiven too!

Reflections from Jail

And there he was. Sitting alone against the wall, wanting a cigarette more than anything he ever wanted.

Nothing to do but wait.
Nowhere to go.

The wall.

It wasn't just another wall...
it was The Wall.

That wall was special. There were sentences carved on it. There were THOUGHTS carved on it. And there was nothing in that small stinky cell to carve with.

The sentences on the wall changed every now and then, without asking for permission, without a fixed pattern... without caring about you.

By that time, the man opened his bleary eyes and looked in front of him.
He began to read.
He thought he was getting mad.
But he went on reading...
some of the things carved on the wall were:

The child is grown, the dream is gone.

I have become comfortably numb.

Fair is foul, and foul is fair:
Hover through the fog and filthy air.

On A lOnG EnOUgH tiMe LinE, ThE suRvIvAL rAte foR evErYOne dRopS TO zer0.

How I wish... how I wish you were here.

YOU,
YES, YOU:
FUCK ME.

...AS HARD AS YOU CAN.

Bestrafe mich
Bestrafe mich
Stroh wird Gold
Und Gold wird Stein
Deine Größe macht mich klein
Du darfst mein Bestrafer sein

I felt a funeral in my brain,
And mourners, to and fro,
Kept treading, treading, till it seemed
That sense was breaking through.

And when they all were seated,
A service like a drum
Kept beating, beating, till I thought
My mind was going numb

And then I heard them lift a box,
And creak across my soul
With those same boots of lead, again.
Then space began to toll

As all the heavens were a bell,
And being, but an ear,
And I and Silence some strange Race
Wrecked, solitary, here.

And then a Plank in Reason, broke,
And I dropped down, and down -
And hit a World, at every plunge,
And Finished knowing - then -

Knowledge-based augmented reality for maintenance assistance

...

- Knock, knock!

- Who's that?

-The police, open the door, please.

-It's 3 o'clock in the morning, how can that be the police?

-There's an order from above: we have to arrest you. Nothing personal.

-That's impossible! I've done nothing wrong lately...

-I'm sorry but...
...

This is what you get when you mess with us.

2 1st problems, 1 2nd time.

There was a city called Paris.
There was a woman whose name does not matter.
There was a man with another last cigarette in his mouth.

There were two problems that seemed impossible to solve... but at last were solved in a very unusual way (typical of this man).

What happens with magic is that everyone tries to give a rational explanation to it. But even if you don't believe in magic, it happens.
Like all the time.

It was just one second in time, but it lasted enough. When fears are faced with blind faith, they just vanish and give way to success... most of the times.

And that's all that matters.



Oh, I almost forgot, there was also a great song (as always).

And what the old hi-fi was singing was:

Hey little girl is your daddy home
Did he go away and leave you all alone
I got a bad desire
I'm on fire

Tell me now baby is he good to you
Can he do to you the things that I do
I can take you higher
I'm on fire

Sometimes it's like someone took a knife baby
edgy and dull and cut a six-inch valley
through the middle of my soul

At night I wake up with the sheets soaking wet
and a freight train running through the
middle of my head
Only you can cool my desire
I'm on fire

The Fall

l(a

le
af
fa
ll

s)
one
l

iness

e.e. cummings

"How the hell do I have to feel about this?"

"Take it easy, man; life just goes like that sometimes"

"Please, stop using those stupid expressions ment to make you feel better about all the crap you're swallowing..."

"James... seriously; do you feel that bad?"

"well..."

"Babylon..."

"... in fact... well, I feel really good... I think"

"That's right. You feel very good. Perhaps better than ever. And do you know why? I'll tell you: because you're alive. And what's more important than that: you're CONSCIOUS you're alive. All that so called 'toubles' are the essence of living, my friend... now you've learnt the lesson. And that has made all the difference."

"hum, I suppose you're right."

"I'm ALWAYS right, dude"

"I guess so...

Wow, it's late! I should be back by now... it's beginning to rain. Perhaps it seems I'm spending my time here... but it's worth it. Every single minute."

The man stood up, shook off his raincoat, lit a cigarette and walked away leaving his footsteps behind as he wandered through the brown and yellow layer covering the ground of the forest.

When he left, all was quiet in the wood. The only sound that broke that stillness for a while was that of a chestnut falling from the tree to whom James was faced a few minutes ago.

Prologue

It was five to twelve. Almost midnight.

The man entered the pub reluctantly. After ordering a JD on the rocks he walked towards the jukebox, trying not to get his raincoat stained (and seeing the surroundings that was a long shot).

He lit a cigarette with his shiny zippo and smoked deeply.
Somewhere he heard a voice saying: "what up, Jimmy?" and nodded without having a look.

The man took out a quarter dollar and put it into the jukebox. He selected an old, lively tune thinking it was what he needed, but the machine didn't seem to work. After a few seconds James kicked the fucking device and a scratchy sound came out while the machine gave back the coin and the music started to sound.

Dammit! that wasn't the song he wanted to hear...
but after a while he smiled and thought: "perhaps that's what I need..."

Two hours later the man left the pub (of course without paying a round) whistling the song he didn't want to hear.

There was a thought running through his head. Something like tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life, but he was too wasted and quite sure he won't remember it the next day.

The well-known tune echoed as the man faded in the shadows of the night:

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, well you might find
You get what you need.